Kirby goes back to the 70's
by Jimborg
Summary: Kirby gets sent back to the 70's after a battle with mirax. This is basically kirby trying to return to his own time while evading the foreces of dark matter. Is rated G for now but that may change.
1. It begins...

Hi, it is I Jimborg. Here is my first ever full-length fan fiction so(please be nice) : Kirby goes back to the 70's in this extravagant 2 parter. In the first part, Kirby must rid pop star dark matter's little brother who has a very nasty surprise. In the next part is Kirby in the setting of star wars: Epioside I, the phantom menace. As always, please R&R.  
  
  
  
Prolouge:  
  
Kirby nearly dogged a blow that had it connected, it would've cleaved our puffy pink person in half. Kirby was in the middle of intense combat with Mirax. The boppy Bro. look alike cackled and fired one of his wing-based cannons at Kirby to atomize Kirby, but again to no avail. Kirby, with an anime sweat drop going down his head realized that the longer that this battle went on, the greater his chances of losing. He turned to his friend and compatriot, Waddle Dee, who was cowering behind a crater in fear. Kirby, tripping over the edge and sliding face first, recovered and went over to waddle Dee and whispered, so as not to be discovered by Mirax. Kirby said, "I have a request of you." Waddle Dee nodded. "Anything" Kirby replied, "I'm going to have to borrow your powers" "WHAT!" Cried Waddle Dee a bit too loudly. Kirby had an anime sweat drop rolling down his head while he tried to shush him, but as he began patting him down he couldn't find his mouth. Giving up, he inhaled waddle Dee and copied his powers. Kirby jumped out of the pit, right in front of Mirax and said, "Eat electro canon" Mirax only looked shocked, as he was vaporized. Well partially. While Mirax, no longer was able to talk, he could communicate telepathically. While he was doing this, Kirby felt wave of hatred and greed roll over him like breakers at a beach, to the point where he physically got sick. Kirby. You may have defeated me. But I shall send you back to a time where hell was not considered a punishment. At this everything began to drip and melt as though they were waxed figures. Kirby recognized this as time compression, from his time spent playing FFVIII. Why did I blow my money on that game? Where his last thoughts before slipping into unconsciousness.  
  
Chapter 1  
  
"Ohhhh" moaned Kirby as he held his head with his pseudo arms. What did he drink last night? He mentally ran through his waking-up-drunk checklist: 1. Make sure you have all articles of clothing. Kirby found that he had no clothing on whatsoever. At this he panicked momentarily until he realized that he normally didn't wear any clothing. 2. Make sure your surroundings are familiar. Kirby propped himself up with his feet and he noted that while it was his room, the bed sheets and posters where different. Everything seemed to be…dimmer to put into a word. 3. Most importantly make sure that there is none sleeping near your original sleeping position to make you think that you were sleeping with them. Kirby looked around and found that he had again slept alone. This all took less than 2 minutes and during this time Kirby was also looking at his surroundings. There was a lava lamp near his bead with little globs of stuff the same color has him being illuminated in a similar tone. There was a clock next to that that was obviously quite old, as it had hands. The posters evenly spaced around his room with bands he didn't even recognize and the calendar across the room read October 1973. With the memory of the fight the previous night returning, information clicked together in his rather large head, which provided no other viable explanation. In a shocked silence he slowly waddled out of the house, only dimly noting the ugly linoleum pattern, walked outside drooped outside to his knees (?) and let out a high pitched yell that would've put Home Alone to shame. 


	2. Shocking revelations

Thank for waiting patiently, I say after dodging the mob beating at my gates. Here is chapter2.  
  
  
  
Chapter 2  
  
Water… He was drowning in water! Waving his flippers around like mad trying to find something to hold on to, he found that he was quite easily able to grasp the sides of a hard ceramic substance. After hauling himself up*, he found that the 'endless' sea of water was nothing more than the kitchen sink. His memory was coming back in murky waves now: The screaming, the passing out at the sight of a slightly disfigured dark matter right in front of him and then nearly drowning in his own kitchen sink! It was so absurd that he laughed a little, which sent him off balance and right back into his own miniature ocean.  
  
Well, almost. A pair of hairy flippers caught him, then set him down on the steps leading up to the kitchen sink; the steps's purpose was to compensate for Kirby's small stature. The fuzzy flippers receded to the ends of Kirby's vision. Kirby zoomed out his view of the flippers, and found himself staring into the familiar shape of Dark Matter!!! Dark Matter in Kirby's house, eating his food, reading his newspaper!!! This caused our pink fluffy power puff** to get so mad that the water steamed off his body as he launched himself in a rage at the intruder. Dark Matter uttered a yelp of surprise and dismay as Kirby made contact. With all the strength Kirby's flippers could muster (which was quite a bit, as is clearly demonstrated in SSB and SSBM) he pummeled his puffy intruder. The voice that came from the dark startled him so much he lost his balance and fell to the ground. "HEY, what the hell are you doing Kirby?!" It was Waddle Dee!! Kirby looked at him with his beady eyes opened wider than their usual small radius, and as he discovered the true identity of his intruder, he exclaimed "Waddle Dee? Is that you?!"  
  
"No, it's the bogey man. Yes, it's me!!" cried Waddle Dee, obviously very frustrated. Kirby gazed at his friend. All you could see was black hair sprouting from his body like a cloud, with the exception of his eye, which made him look very much like Dark Matter. "Waddle Dee, why are you dressed like a little black rain cloud?" Waddle Dee sniffed indignantly. "Well, my pink compatriot, it is a little something called fashion! And this is not a black rain cloud! It's a fro!" Kirby gazed incredulously at his friend for one, two, three beats… Then burst out laughing so hard he immediately lost his balance and fell on the tile, making a sound akin to a wet fish. When the laughter subsided into giggles he talked in short gasps. "A fro? * gasp, gasp * he, he, you're about 30 years behind in style!!" The laughter died an instant death as he remembered the year on the calendar he had seen. He took air into his lungs to prepare for another scream when a hairy flipper was slapped over his mouth. "Don't do it Kirby! You don't have the lung capacity!" Forcing himself to calm down, Kirby then recounted everything that had happened, starting from the fight last night and going forward to the present moment in time. Fully expecting Waddle Dee to burst out laughing like he had done a short moment ago, he was mildly surprised when all Waddle Dee did was nod his head and say "that's deep, man". Kirby looked at him quizzically "I thought that you would've been laughing your head off just like I was a second ago. Waddle Dee shook his head "Heck no, man. You and I have been through a lot together. I know you would never kid around in a situation like this." Waddle Dee began recounting all the adventures that he and Kirby had had.  
  
Except, Kirby didn't remember any of the adventures that Waddle Dee was mentioning. When Kirby brought this to Waddle Dee's attention, Waddle Dee looked concerned as his eye indented in a frown. He thought like this for a couple minutes when he sprang up and cried out "I know what to do!" Kirby replied with "What?" Waddle Dee said "We can go ask the great funky one!" Kirby looked confused "And, who pray tell is the great funky one?" Waddle Dee motioned for Kirby to follow as he brought him beneath a giant poster. The creature on the poster looked kind of familiar to Kirby. But if you took away the afro and the freaky clothes, you would be left with a very familiar King Dedede.  
  
  
  
* After running a model I have determined that is impossible for Kirby to have the necessary leverage to haul himself up: His flippers are too short, and his center of gravity makes him top heavy.  
  
** I really have no idea what Kirby is made out of. My best guesses are that he is either made out of muscle or he is just a big bag of skin with the stomach taking up the majority of the space. 


End file.
